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(The picture this week is of a shapeshifter lost in the woods. Its for a group project thing I've joined on DeviantArt. Because shut up, it's my blog and it's awesome.)
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Are you befuddled and transfused with all the new linguistical terms being thrown around on the fast-moving world of the internet in recent daytimes? Well be craniaddled no more friendio! 
The good people person at Extrapolated Cynicism is here to "help"!
(We I am required by law to place inverted commas around the word "help" when used in this context. This is after what we I shall refer to only as "The Dyslexic Tnuc Incident".) 
We I have compiled a brief "Internetspeak 101" list to "help" you comprestand the leetnoobs of the current degeneration!

Blography: The school subject of studying and writing in a digital media format.
Points are awarded on the basis of Creativity, Speed, Amount, Design, Premise, and Popularity. 
The ability to actually write anything compelling or even legible is purely optional.

Count Blogula: a mythical figurein the food critic world of blogging. Famous for dark, edgy, biting restaurant reviews, he only types in the dead of night. Legend has it that clicking any links containing the words "Holy", "Garlic", or "Steak" can cause him to write a rash, raw, screaming blog post that can cause you to faint, and cause you to become helpless but to convert to his way of thinking.

Bloggerrific: A positive adjective used to describe something that is: A) Worthy of a blog post of at least 1000 words, or B) A blog post that causes such eclectic delight in the reader that it causes a minor anuerysm that results in at least three "lol"s (or four if you're using the imperial system). or C) Cats.

Blogological Attachment: The unnatural need a writer has to update their blog on a regular basis, even if they have no material to update with.

Anablogic Steroids: Any substance used to create enormous blog posts with no real clue of what they're doing. E.g. Twelve photos of the same cat in the same position. 

Inblogniac: A blogger who posts all day, every day, often erratically and with a shakey grip on reality, with no discernable breaks for sleep.

Blog Me A River (shortened to BMAR): When a blog post is nothing more then a useless, crybaby dissertation on a subject little or no people care about.

Blognostic: A person who is open to the idea of blogging, but will not start until they have been given valid reason, motivation, encouragement, and a few hard kicks up the arse for good measure.
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This concludishes our my exposaction to "help" you in your advenships into the Blogosphere. 

Good Blarg!
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That's all the dillywagging marksplanation for now. Go and read some Esperanto or somestuff . . . 


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