I'm not proud of it, but I confess, sometimes the mood just takes me to go to a badly ventialted room with needy young people to play repeated, ear-bleedingly loud music with strangers to awkwardly learn how to not-dance. All while paying rediculous amounts of money for weak alcohol so I can get sufficiently shitfaced enough to fool myself into thinking that it's not all bad.
I suppose it's pretty hilarious in it's own way. And that in itself is kind of depressing.
. . .
Screw it. Here's the type of people who make it worth it. Just for the shits and giggles.
. . .
The Leaner (The Buttress / The Handsinthepockets / Get the fuck out of my way!)
Thoughts: Holy Shit, you guys! Are the walls structurally sound in this building? I better sacrifice the best part of my night for the sole purpose of creating an impromptu buttress against this load-bearing vertical face. No! Go on without me. I'll be alright. Perhaps if I cross my legs, put one hand in one pocket, hold my drink with the other, and never take a sip, I'll create optimum leverage. This will make me sooo popular.
Pictured: What will not be happening to this person tonight.
The Raver (Glo-prick / The Animal / The Stripper / Get the fuck out!)
(Read complete with inappropriately emphasised words.)
WOAHYEAH! This is gonna be the greatest party EVAR and NOONE'S gonna stop me from GETTIN' the ROIDE tonight! Get mah glowsticks, everyones gonna LOOVE when I shower them with these babies! It'll be JUST like that one time in Ibiza which was under totally different set-up, environment, and circumstances, but WHO gives a FUCK, right? WOAH! Hey, FUCK you bouncer, whatyamean get out? (Runs. Get's tackled. Get's dragged out.)
What they see . . .
. . . What's really happening.
The Stumbler (The human Leaner / The Drunkie / The Splasher / Get the fuck off me!)
Aaayerchysocuuuute. . . . (waits for the next carraige in their train of thought to arrive) . . . . . dammmmnthatgrroopofpeepleshawt. . . . . . . . Imgonnagetinnonnthat . . . . . . . WOOOoooahhjeesuswhoolefttthatsteppthere? . . . . . . whyyysevvryonnepushhinmeeaway? . . . . . wooooahh . . . . . .ihavvvadrink! . . . . .'Salmostemptytho. . . . . iwassureitwasfulljustasec. . . . . . . whyamiallwet? . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Why am I outsid-OHGODTHEPAIN!
OH GOD! WHY DOES IT HURT TO THINK?
The Screamer (a.k.a. The Flailer / Get the fuck down!)
Thoughts: None, really, but they will try to dictate them as they occur.
For example: WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHOHMYGOWDISTHIS"GALWAYGIRL"ILOVETHISSONGCOSI'MFROMGALWAYSOIT'SABOUTMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Repeated every time the song is played)
Can you imagine this poor guy's pain?
The Normal (The Nondescript / Trying to get The Fuck.)
Thoughts: Why am I here? Everyone's having a better time than me. My drink better still be where I left it. Is it? Yeah, it is. Oh wow, someone I don't immediately know is in our little dance circle! They're pretty cute t- aaand now they have they're back turned to me like a snowplough in reverse. Get the fuck out of my way. Oh fuck this for a game of hackeysack. I'm gonna go get my drin- where the fuck is it? Ooohhhwhyamiherehyamiherehyamiherehyamiherehyamihere. Fuckin Stumblers stealin my pint again.
. . .
That's all I have to say right now. Go join an RPing club or something. . . then look up what RPing is. . .
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