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A fully loaded Uzi 9 mm of well-balanced opinions!

Things can always get worse. This is an iron-clad rule we must all learn the hard way.

 . . .
Bad Luck: Finding a worm in your apple.
Worse Luck: Finding evidence that a worm may have been making residence in the apple which you just ate.
Bad Karma Overload: The apple is a grenade.

Bad Luck: Getting caught out in heavy rain.
Worse Luck:  . . . while a mile away from home with a dead mobile phone, unable to call for help.
Bad Karma Overload: . . . when you're a snowman.

Bad Luck: Realising you've missed a deadline.
Worse Luck: Realising you've missed a final exam.
Bad Karma Overload: Realising you've missed out on all the opprtunities for meaningful relationships in your life, and they were all dependant on the exams you missed.

Bad Luck: Getting dumped.
Worse Luck: . . . at the altar.
Bad Karma Overload: . . . because she thought you were a woman all this time.

Bad Luck: A collision between your car and another's.
Worse Luck: . . . which leaves your car with a scratch and none on the other's.
Bad Karma Overload: The scratch is three feet deep and six long. Through the engine.

Bad Luck: You get an illness.
Worse Luck: . . . from a loved one.
Bad Karma Overload: . . . it's terminal, and your lover leaves you for your care nurse.

Bad Luck: Your housemate eats your plate of food in the fridge, they throw half of it away.
Worse Luck:  It's after the nuclear apocalypse. There is no other food around without risking dismemberment by the mutants who live out in the wasteland.
Bad Karma Overload: The food landed on that big ball of fuzzy stuff that came out of the dryer.

Bad Luck: Your house gets robbed.
Worse Luck: The thieves ignore the valuable stuff and take only yours.
Bad Karma Overload: You have no proof of ownership, so you have to buy it back off them over eBay.

Bad Luck: Someone else uses your scissors to cut their hair.
Worse Luck: They have lice.
Bad Karma Overload: They don't have any hair on their head.

Bad Luck: You die the most embarrassing death imaginable. (I'm thinking something involving a sex toy factory and a world leader's summit)
Worse Luck: . . . your death was broadcast live to the whole world, with record-breaking viewing figures.
Bad Karma Overload: . . . after everything else on this list had happened to you earlier in the week.
Karmapocalypse: . . . your birth name is Racistlover McTwinklytits Jr.
 . . . 
Take a guess as to how many of those events have happened to me. I'll give you a clue. It's more than one.
 . . . 
WOOHOO! Over 500 pageviews bitches! Next milestone is 1000!

Wait . . . what the fuck did I write in July? Seriously, I made like, 2 posts that month.
Did I finally get onto an FBI watch list, or what?
 . . . 
That's a wrap for now. Now go watch a movie in bed or something.


Magatha-May said...

how does it feel to have a readership?

Tynermeister said...

pretty damn good I must say. Now I just have to deal with the pressure of living up to that readerships' standards :P

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